Competition in the Face of Tragedy
March 31st 2007 Posted at Food and Drink
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A very good friend of mine has been struggling through Leukemia. It really is a pain the ass for him, in the hospital, out of the hospital; major victories, big setbacks, etc. It really is a roller coaster. It has caused me to think more about maximizing my living – but that is a story for a different post.
We have been friends for a long time. Our families interact quite a bit and we are all close. I have noticed recently that some of the newer members of our circle of friends seem to have a competitive spirit about knowing, learning, and disseminating updates in regards to his health or situation. I have have a paranoid/pessimistic spirit which I constantly battle with, but it almost seems like it is more important to appear to the rest of the world as the #1 supportive friend – rather than just being a supportive friend. Makes me questions a person motives a little bit.
I get similar feelings when there is competition among family members. When I was young, I never really felt much pressure or pride about who embraced the family functions the most. But as I have grown older and have decided that I enjoy entertaining people and enjoyed having people over, I have noticed that there is an unspoken egocentric competition to hosting family gatherings. Particularly ‘official’ ones. Who is having Easter, who is having Thanksgiving, how are we going to fit everyone in at Christmas? It no longer is about entertaining or about having a good time, it is more about who is the person that can prove to the rest of us that they care the most or that they honor tradition the most. I would prefer to just get together with no pretense, with no pressure to have a superlative time. Then if you have a superlative time you can be relaxed enough to enjoy it.




